love

Hand in Hand

A portal opened,
We were allowed to see
Through the window
Of our destiny.
So we gazed,
Hand in hand,
At our future
In the sand.
Nearing our exit,
Still as one,
Marveling at
The setting sun.
Content in love,
We will not dread
The final dusk
That lies ahead.
One day we will
Sail into night,
Hand in hand,
Final twilight.

 

Photo taken by my then 10 year old son.

Prism

I once believed I was devoid of light,
That nothing from within me radiated.
My sun had set casting eternal night.
I kept my dark heart alone and gated.
In a chance meeting my soul would ignite,
It was for him that my daybreak waited.
He is the prism through which my rays pass.
I’ve found a full spectrum of love at last.

Pas de Deux

Caught in a perpetual pas seul,
Overburdened by loneliness,
Depressed, demi-plié to grand plié,
Grand plié to à terre…
Despondent, she grew weary.
The music fell upon deaf ears.
Her dance became motionless.
Defective and lifeless,
Her cavalier found her there.
He hoisted her listless form,
Presented her to the heavens,
And begged the deities for clemency.
In a show of mercy,
Her passion was resurrected.
Her vigor was restored.
Her grace was revived.
His devotion, their compassion,
Induced a pirouette of perseverance in her.
She became a virtuoso in his arms,
Soaring overhead in defiance of gravity.
Today they glide across the stage of life,
In demonstration of eternal gratitude,
Together in a flawless tour de force.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In case you aren’t a ballerina…
à Terre: On the ground
Cavalier: Male partner of a ballerina
Demi-plié: Half bending at the knees
Grand plié: Full bending at the knees
Pas seul: Solo dance
Pirouette: Whirl or spin
Tour de force: A series of brilliant technical steps

Image courtesy of Yana182 on DeviantArt.com

 

The World is a Better Place

Happy birthday to my favorite person on Earth, my husband, Brian! The world is a better place because he was born. Any man who loves like he loves deserves only the finest things in this life. I strive to always give him only the best of myself. He regularly does the same for me…

For example, one day many years ago I was struggling through a particularly tough day. He sent me an email that contained these words and changed the tone of my entire week.

The way this woman looks at me
A look of intense love
She looks at me like I am a King
Her Kingdom mine for the taking
She is my Queen
I would die for her
That intense love burns deep within
Hotter than molten lava
A feeling that has never been felt before
She looks at me for strength
I will stand like a pillar of granite for her
Fathering her children as my own
Loving them more than myself
Guiding them down the right path in life
Protecting them from harm
I am there for her
I am there for them
I will always be there
Intense Love
Always…
Forever…

~~~~~~~~~~

I love you, Awesome.

 

Happy Anniversary!

April 30th is one of my favorite days of the year. On April 30th, 1999, my life changed forever in a most beautiful way (except I didn’t know it yet). On this date 15 years ago I was scheduled for a second interview at a small technology company. I was nervous. I needed that job. My first interview went well. I felt that day was my last hurdle on my way to a sure thing. I was all about my career back then. I had 2 kids’ mouths to feed. I was engaged to a man whose ambition was seriously lacking. Someone had to wear the pants.

I looked good for that interview too. My un-humble opinion of my appearance that day was further supported when I got “checked out” by the really hot guy with whom I shared an elevator. We both stepped off at the top floor. Then we turned down the same hallway; we kept walking, all the way to the end where we both entered the same office door.  Nice, he works here. I thought. I waited in the small lobby to be greeted by the operations manager. He fetched me and walked me back to a very small office. Inside the office were 3 very intimidating men. I was the fourth person crammed into that tiny room. It was close quarters. Not only that, but HE was there. My nerves almost turned to full on panic.

The cute guy did most of the talking. He grilled me with tough questions. Damn, I thought we made a little connection in that elevator. He is showing me no mercy! As his inquiry continued, I started to find him a little less cute. Eventually he let the shy guy from accounting talk. Accounting guy was impressed with my answers. I could tell. Then the little hairy man from production got his turn. He was impressed with my legs and my tattoo. I could tell. (I was sitting right next to him. It was tough not to notice that he stared at my calves the whole time he spoke.) Hot guy was not impressed. I could tell. I left the interview with my ego a bit deflated.

I was surprised to get a phone call the following Monday asking me to come in to meet the owner and to appear for personality and intelligence testing. Turns out that the cute guy WAS impressed. He was recently promoted to Technology Operations Manager. He was helping to hire a replacement to back-fill his old position. He fought for me. He felt I was the best fit. I totally read him wrong. That was unusual for me.

During the first week at work in my new job, each department took turns escorting the newbies to lunch. When it was technology’s turn, I took the opportunity to start over with hot guy. I cornered him after lunch for a little one-on-one. I learned that he was very happily married. I also found out that he was extraordinarily smart, much less serious than his interviewer persona, and a little egotistical. I found his marital status less than ideal… Why on earth would it bother me that he’s married? I wondered, I’m pretty unavailable myself.

From that point on it was strictly professional, even if I did enjoy stealing little glances at him. Ladies, he was that good-looking. I was engaged, not dead. Four months into my new job something both shattering and spectacular happened. My fiance’ left. He packed his things and several of mine and just left while I was at work. The next day, he moved himself and many of my possessions from Michigan to Texas. At the time, I was shattered. Other events unfolded that weekend to make it one of the worst ever. I missed work on Monday. On Tuesday I went directly to the break room upon arriving at work. Hot guy was there. We had our first ever personal and deep conversation. As it would turn out, his wife also moved out of their home over the weekend. We exchanged phone numbers so we could commiserate. A month later, we went on our first date. Within three months we were inseparable. By New Year’s we were living together.

Fast forward 3 years from our first meeting to April 30, 2002. I married hot guy, aka Brian, in Las Vegas. I was sick as hell. I spent the entire night before our wedding in the bathroom, if you know what I mean. My sister scraped me up off the floor when she arrived to help me get ready. She slapped makeup like paint on my face and made me presentable, for a china doll. I only bring that up because I’ve been sick this week too. Twelve years later April is still my health nemesis. Some things never change.

Brian and I have come a long way in the past 12 years. My older kids were already calling him “Dad” before the wedding, but his position as a father and their relationship with him only grew after we were married. We have a son, Brandon, who is just the best of both of us. Our marriage is the light that shines brightest in my life. I love him more today than I ever have. I will love him even more tomorrow.

Every day for the past 12 years, he has come upstairs at night and asked if I remembered to take my meds before he climbs into bed. He has told me that he loves me EVERY SINGLE DAY. We are still inseparable. He is my best friend. When I see him bring his briefcase home at lunch, I squeal with delight like we’re high schoolers skipping school (a briefcase at lunch means either a half day or he’s working the rest of the day from home). He is my staunchest supporter. He is my guardian and defender. He is my lover, my confidant, my provider, my grounding stone, and my whole heart and soul. My life is exceptional because Brian is in it. Stories will be told about our love long after we are dead and gone. It is powerful, it is real, it is unique, it is pure, it was destined to be, and it is unbreakable. I was put on this earth to be Mrs. Brian Page.

I LOVE YOU, AWESOME ~ ALWAYS and in ALL WAYS.